Some people are not as smart. Some people are not as smart. Some people are not as smart. Some people are not as smart. Some people are not as smart. Some people are not as smart. Some people are not as smart. Some people are not as smart.

Sometimes, I have to keep telling myself this with all the weirdos I come across.

For instance, weirdos like: DanZenGerZy from OKCupid.

Message 1:
“Hi. You are on my quiver match. Your profile sounds arrogant. Just being honest and straight forward. Bye.”

First off…my profile does NOT sound arrogant. Upon receiving this email, I went straight to the people who know me best, and asked for their most honest opinions. I even, went as far as, asking my male friends for their opinions.

The verdict? “You’re funny D, but if someone doesn’t have a sense of humor, they’re not going to get it. Your profile is fine. Don’t change it. That would be like changing your personality, and for what? A guy who’s mad because he didn’t fit your height requirement?”

So, I wrote him back. And, I was not nice. Can you blame me?

ME:
“LMAO! My profile sounds arrogant?

First of all…who posts ALL of their degrees and certifications on their profile?

Not to mention, you over-tell your life story in dollar signs. “I’ve got two cars…” “I waste my money on Louis Vuitton and Armani…” “I make 80K-100K…”

Who gives a shit? If you want someone to like you for all of your materialistic possessions…why don’t you look for love on I’m-Wealthy-And-A-Dumbass.com?

Just for the record, you were my Quiver Match too, but I hit “decline.”

Don’t get mad because you didn’t fit my height requirement.

And do me a favor…DON’T write me back.

Bye.

P.S. That hummer you have? It’s not real…it’s a fake GMC body. Why don’t you save up your pennies, instead of spending them at Armani, and buy a real hummer.”

But of course he wrote me back! Of course! And again, and again, and again. I never wrote him back, but HE felt the need to write me three more times. Fun times!

Message 2 – 10:46 a.m.
“Not a real hummer? So the real hummer is only those in the military? What do you have? Yes my other car is a 5 series.

You’re a dumbass. You thought you are so smart enough. Do you have a degree? Oh yeah, cooking? I bet you are just a high school grad. Lol

Nothing personal, just wanna argue.”

Message 3 – 11 a.m.
“Ah, arrogance on her driving. Wanna race? If i win, you will tell the world how arrogant and dumbass you are. Im a 4th place Drifting comp driver winner in union city, 2003. So what do you drive again? What’s your degree, cooking? Lol”

Message 4 – 11:13 a.m.
Anyway, you claiming yourself a good catch is arrogance. But you talk shit like a ghetto. Oh yes you are a cheap ghetto who cannot afford a Louis Vuitton or Armani. Social climber you. Your height makes you so small. I’m not attracted to you so don’t be so assuming like you always do. Most white girls like you doesn’t take a bath.

I just want to challenge you to prove to you that you are totally arrogant though has nothing.”

Don’t get me wrong, I realize that the way he wrote his profile, was meant to be funny and sarcastic…but I am pretty DAMN sure, that some of it is real.

And to think OKCupid matched us up at 86%. W-T-F-ever!

I think I’m going to change my profile to:

Dumbass. Arrogant. Ghetto. White Girl. Social Climber. Doesn’t like short people. Smells.

Think I’d get a guy???

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