First Date Awkwardness

LikeOmigod! Did I arrive early enough? Did I forget to put deoderant on? Gosh, he’s skinnier than me, hope he likes big chicks. I’m totally an inch taller than him! I hope that he doesn’t think because I’m wearing this shirt, that I’m easy. He barely ate anything. I ate everything on my plate. He must think I’m a pig. Do I have lettuce in my teeth? He totally put his arm around me, does that mean I have to kiss him at the end of the night? LikeOmigod! Long pause…“So…how do you like the weather?” So we clicked, and we kissed, but he’s a little too ‘hand’ friendly. He just grabbed my ass! Should I say something? He’s dropping me off. I want to talk more, but I don’t want to ask him in, making him think I want to sleep with him. LikeOmigod…he went to give me a goodnight kiss and ended up kissing my nose!!! *sigh*

So I still have a few friends left that are single (shout out to all the married ones) and the last time I had a girl’s night, one of my friends told me about a first date she had with this guy she thought was great. Apparently the date had gone really well and the chemistry was there, until the “first date awkwardness” crept up at the end of the night and he grabbed her ass during a kiss.

It happens to everyone. Even me. (Clearly.)

First dates are hard. Not only do you have to wow someone through your profile (if you’re dating online) but you have to make it during the entire course of your first date to possibly get a second.

So I recently had a date with this guy we’ll call Dimples. Um yeah…deepest and cutest dimples one has ever seen.

Anyways…he had tickets to the Mavericks/Rockets game and suggested we go knowing we both shared a love for the Rockets. It was a great first date pick! I love basketball.

To start off the night, I was to meet him at his eco-friendly* high rise and we’d walk to the American Airlines Center.
*I totally cyberstalked his building (it was only fair after he did the same to me and found this blog).

So I get there and while I’m waiting nervously as the concierge guy looks me up and down, the first thing I think to myself is…do I look fat in this? I mean the morning of my date (a day I had to go to work), I think I totally tried on several hundred outfits. I had even changed into different shoes and accessories before deciding that I was totally late and needed to go and just said “to hell with it.”

When we talked on the phone, I never mentioned to him that because of doctor’s orders I wasn’t allowed to work out from August up until now or that I had gained a few pounds from what’s been going on [healthwise] and that I’m still a medical mystery. Should I have told him I might look a smidge different from my pictures? I promise I’ve been working on it. Instead…I just kept wondering if I could cover up my chin with my scarf and the rest of my body with my jacket. I had my ankles and legs covered! Yay for jeans!

How stupid am I? I wonder if that was ever a thought that came to his mind?

Anyways…the first thing that popped into my mind when he walked up was that I was taller than him. And he even said it too!!! I responded with “only an inch.” It bothered me a little, but we got along so well, at that point, I didn’t care.

So as he’s coming toward me to greet me, I awkwardly put out my hand like I’m going to an interview (even though I’m much more of a hugger). Thankfully he pulled the whole arms stretched out and he went for the hug…only after he looked at me weird for having my hand out. Awkward number 1. Me. I started it. A handshake? Really?

So the hug ended and that’s when he told me he needed to go upstairs to get some things, put his satchel down, etc. And then he said, “Well you can come up with me or you’re more than welcome to stay here.” The sharpei-look-a-like concierge wasn’t doing it for me so I told him I’d go up with him. And immediately after I said it, I regretted it. I didn’t want him thinking that I randomly go into people’s houses on first dates and even said my thought out loud. In which he responded, “well you’re more than welcome to stay here, I don’t want you to feel obligated to come upstairs with me.”

I ended up going upstairs. In fact, I told him I wanted to see his view. And a view he did have. It was beautiful. Nothing indecent happened. We continued to bond over shoes and decor and work, etc. And we finally made our way downstairs to start walking to the game.

So let’s fast forward. Because if I literally went through all of the details of the date…this blog would be 10 pages long. Instead of telling you that my mind was thinking and replaying a million different thoughts while I was on my date, let’s just say that the Rockets are a damn good team! 😉

Anyways, there was never a second date. In fact…I never received a call from him, nor did I place one to him. And really to this day I wouldn’t be able to give you a reason as to why I never called or vice versa. We got along well. We had fun. I guess we just didn’t click…enough.

But this blog is not about my date with him, but about plain ol’ awkwardness. The thoughts you feel before, during and after the date, the actions like handshake hugs or guy’s grabbing ass during a kiss, the millions of thoughts running in and out of your head. It happens to everyone. It happened to my friend. It happened to me during my date with JG (you know, the Rib Guy), when I didn’t know how to end the date while sitting in his car. It also happened when I was on my date with a guy from my past during the Thanksgiving holiday. We were walking and we both bumped into each other and he grabbed at my hand, but I didn’t grab back, but wanted to and it felt all sorts of awkward, because I didn’t want him to think that I didn’t want to hold his hand.

Heck…I really wish there was a manual. But there’s not.

Until then, this particular blog is not another one of those entries where I put someone on blast or discuss how bad a date was, but that first date awkwardness will always come and go. This blog is to let people out there, know that while I may be having a good or bad date, my mind is too. And this blog is to let you know that I’m human and that I make mistakes too. I just don’t jizz on myself during the movie. 🙂

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